Spam, wonderful spam

Who here honestly doesn’t love spam comments? Oh, everyone? Well, I’m doing this anyway.

To celebrate the fact I am getting more and more spam comments on my posts, I thought I would actually dignify some with a response. Just the shorter and/or more bizarre ones mind, not the essays or those with a thousand links to online pharmacies. I won’t be including what is still my all-time favourite, because I responded to that one last year in the form of a poem (which appears in my second published collection, available here).

Anyway, without further ado…

From: Frederick Bottgenbach
Comment: “glad to be one of many visitants on this awful web site”

You are most welcome, Frederick. Though you may be surprised that, despite the almost unrivalled awfulness of this website, it doesn’t get that many visitants. But thank you for popping by and noting just how terrible my blog truly is.

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From: Joanna PM18

Comment: “porn black feet fish free farm porn fitness girl porn movies adult porn non nude akira porn game”

Holy cow! Fish free farm porn? That’s awesome! The one drawback I’ve always found with farm porn is the amount of fish. I can’t wait to finally watch it without!

Also, how does a non-nude porn game work? Surely if it’s non-nude, it isn’t porn?

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From: Rachioka

Comment: “удалите,пожалуйста!” [Delete please!]

No.

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From: Dimple Dragula

Comment: “Hi there! Someone in my Myspace group shared this site with us so I came to check it out. I’m definitely enjoying the information. I’m book-marking and will be tweeting this to my followers! Exceptional blog and excellent style and design.”

Myspace! You’re funny. And fifteen years out of date.

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From: Glenn Corridan

Comment: “This website doesn’t display properly on my droid – you may want to try and repair that.”

Sorry Glenn, I don’t know much about droid repairs. Try Tatooine, perhaps? I’m sure one of the towns there should have a workshop for that kind of thing.

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From: Robertgycle

Comment: “Hello. And Bye.”

Hel- oh, see ya.🙁

 

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Response to the Word of the Day Challenge prompt: bizarre