I don’t profess to be a doctor
I never went to medical school
But it seems you tested positive
For being a tool

I accept my understanding
Of the anatomy is sparse
But if there’s one thing I know
It’s that you’re talking out your arse

Age isn’t on your side
And you’re really rather fat
But worse of all it seems you’re just
A massive fucking twat

Don’t worry; it isn’t fatal
You’re not really even sick
All it truly means is
You’re a prick

I won’t beat around the bush
I’m gonna give it to you blunt
So here’s my final diagnosis:
You’re a cunt

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